Hi! My name’s Liz and I am NOT an alcoholic

Liz Horsman smiling at camera

But I am a songwriter, a music publisher, I have an advanced diploma in Parks Inner Child Therapy and I wrote this blog for you.  When I quit alcohol it was like waking from a spell, The Alcohol Spell and here I am now, hoping to help you do the same.

I Gave Up Alcohol 2 Years Ago

I gave up because I didn’t want the internal chatter anymore. You might know the chatter I mean:

“I think I’ll have a glass of wine….But it’s only 5pm…. I better wait until 6pm ….. God, I think I must have a drink problem …. Why do I overanalyse everything? …. But do I though? …… Goddammit woman!  Have a drink!”

I went round and round these conversations in my head for about 2 years before I finally quit. You can read more about the moment I decided I was never going to drink again, here.

I Don’t Like The Word Alcoholic

I say I’m not an alcoholic because I have a big problem with the word. I don’t know about you but it makes me think of a drunk. A slurry, rough sleeping, piss soaked boozer who has given up on life in favour of alcohol. You and I both know that you can drink a shit load of alcohol and still have a perfectly normal life, thank you very much. The word ‘alcoholic’ is keeping people enslaved to alcohol.

My father died when he was 52 of multiple organ failure due to years of heavy drinking and my step mother followed him a few years later. I do not believe in the disease model of alcoholism and had this not been the prevailing belief at the time of my dad’s treatment I think he might have survived. Of course, we are all different. Alcoholics Anonymous works for some but for many it won’t last. If you have found AA to be your saviour, then good for you. I wouldn’t want to change your mind on that. But personally, I think the whole alcohol discussion needs a ground up rethink.

Why I can’t moderate my drinking

Me and my Dad

Alcohol Really Crept Up On Me

I binged my twenties away and progressed to a more civilised glass or 2 of wine a night with posh Prosecco parties at weekends. Being in the music industry has given me a ‘license to lush’.

Girl in neon accessories ready to party

Standard Tuesday night in the studio.

But very gradually my relationship with alcohol changed, almost imperceptibly and I didn’t really notice how overpowering it had become. A bit like watching a child grow. It’s like one day I’m bouncing my son Riley on my knee and the next I’m standing next to him and he is 6′ 2″ and towering over me and I’m like, SHIT! You’re a whole head taller than me. When did that happen!?

Alcohol did that to me. I suddenly saw how crazy big it had become and I needed to evict it from my life. Bad analogy really since obviously I hope my kids never leave home! 😉

Woman laughing with goldendoodle

Life without alcohol is amazing. Esther my Golden Doodle was never this much fun!

I Want To Help You Break The Alcohol Spell

The Alcohol Spell is my passion project and I am so incredibly passionate about it! The alcohol industry must shoulder the blame for the approximately 3.2 million deaths each year, attributable to alcohol. YES, we all have a choice but few of us have the FACTS.

I hope that The Alcohol Spell will lift the veil on the illusion of alcohol as an ‘essential item’ in your life and help you break a spell that’s kept you enslaved to one of the most addictive substances on earth. You can wake up from alcohol and when you do, you will wonder why you slept for so long!

©LIZ HORSMAN 2020

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